Play {Part 1}

I am loving every little activity we've done together lately.  I don't know why I ever dragged my feet.  Well, I guess I do.  The thought of planning and preparing for and then setting up a giant activity simply overwhelmed me.  So for years, I would do nothing.  It's a classic trait of perfectionists--that of wanting to do everything so perfectly that you end up doing nothing at all.  I "used to be" a perfectionist.  I say, "used to be" because I am truly changing.  Slowly.  But I hope I'm making headway.

But anyway, thoughts of messes and spills and stuff strewn about the house, not to mention the thought of having to organize and store it all, or maybe just throw it away....let's just say, I had a hard time psyching myself into kid-friendly activities.  So for a long while, (and I regret this very much), we played the safe route.  We played with toys and games that were easy to pull out and easy to pick up.  We read books and played outside.  And while I will forever incorporate these comfortable things, this year I figured out how to incorporate the ones I've always avoided.

The switch came last year as I've mentioned in previous posts.  It was the only birthday gift I wanted in the midst of terrible depression...that of desiring to be with and enjoying every second of my children.  The gift was bestowed through much fasting and prayer and lots of time.  It came gradually, and I don't know if there was a set day when the lightbulb clicked on.  It was more like a sunrise which gradually illuminates the surroundings almost imperceptibly.

And this year, I set about trying to revise my daily rhythm.  And with this new routine, we have a set aside time each day called "Mommy Playtime."  And while this isn't new (for I've always tried to play with my children daily), having a name for it, and having a specific time, made it happen more consistently.  We're definitely not perfect, (and it is so relieving to finally accept that), but it is a time I look forward to now.  And so do my little ones.  We switch off picking activities, and surprisingly, the activities they pick are the simplest.  Easton loves to color with me--folder games and such.  Tate loves to trace letters or play "the letter game" (our own made-up preschool version of Boggle).  It is sweet to see them want to repeat over and over the things they most love to do.  Children love repetition and learn best through repeats of simple activities.

On my days, I pick activities that they haven't picked in a while--things lurking in the back of the preschool closet that they've forgotten about.  Then it seems like they pick the same thing the next day because they remember how fun it was when they used to play it.  And then on Fridays (or whichever day works best) I let them pick an activity from one of my Pinterest boards.

And now a word about Pinterest.  It used to overwhelm me with all of the creative ideas that I would never have time for.  It was like subjecting myself to an unnecessary guilt session.  But now that I have committed to only embrace the simple, memorable, it has become such a great resource.  I follow a few choice pinterester's who share really simple, yet fun activities.  I repin their pins and currently have children's boards in art, sensorial, creative writing, science, social studies, math, letter/sound recognition, literacy, story time, practical life skills, and movement.  I don't pressure myself into thinking I have to do anything in any particular order, or do everything, or pick things "equally."  I just take a minute to ask myself what strikes my fancy (or theirs) for that particular week, and we do it.  And the wonderful thing is, there is no crazy-hard prep time.  The activities use things that we usually have on hand and can throw together as we're getting ready to do it.

Plus, once we've made an activity, whether it be homemade play dough (there are a million flavors and variations and creations) a game, or just something fun, we can add it to the "preschool closet" for them to pick in the future.  It's like increasing your resources as you go.

But before I get too carried away in the joy of it all, know that I still face discouragement and opposition.  It's still hard for me to mentally and physically "do it."  I often have a few inner groanings beneath my smiling face as I wonder if I'm ready for yet another activity.  But if I press on, I find that within even just 2 minutes of beginning, I am glowing with joy.  I feel radiant and recharged and full of energy.  Not to mention how my heart overflows with love for my little ones as they're exploring their world and beaming themselves.

My only regret is that I didn't start this 5 years sooner.  I missed out on so much.  Sometimes my heart hurts when I think of all the precious memories I could have shared with my little boys.  I look at Maylie, and think how lucky she is to have me as her mom now that I've had more experience.  My poor boys had the "amateur mother" who really didn't know how to do it all right.  And if I allow myself to dwell in these shadows too long, I feel saddened and despondent.  Do you ever feel that way?  Am I the only one who, even though I tried my very best, still feels regret?

Well, regret or no, I always have now, and now is never too late.  And so I will give my Maylie what I wish I would have given my boys.  And I will give them everything I can give before they grow up and move away.  Because I don't want to waste one more minute.  Now is here and it's a glorious present.  It's the best present I've ever received....

And so, here are some "play pictures" from the past month.  I couldn't help taking a million pictures of their creativity, but thankfully narrowed it down significantly (to 43?!)

I can't wait to continue documenting our journey this year.  I have a grand feeling about it all...

Cars in the Parking Lot.
{Say a number, then they drive their car to the correct parking stall.  Great number recognition, and for Easton, I would say an addition or subtraction problem, then he would have to figure out which stall to go to by doing the mental math}

 {What Maylie did while we played Cars}


Marshmallow Creations
{Toothpicks + marshmallows = instant fun.}

 {And with a little tasting, what could be better??}

The Pile of Books

{This is where I find Maylie when I can't find her....pulling out all of her board books and reading.  She's my little bookworm.}

Inventor's Workshop
{By far, the favorite.  Easy peasy play dough (via the Imagination Tree), and then whatever you have lying around.  We used pipe cleaners, old cords, cables, ear phones, glow sticks, and lids}

{P.S. This activity lasted hours on Saturday and hours on Sunday afternoon too!}

{This was an alien}

{Another alien}

Play Foam.
{This was Easton's 6-month birthday present.  42 little pouches of these foam balls that never dry out or lose their shape.  They are non-messy and leave no residue anywhere.  These have been awesome!}

Lego Airplanes.
{This kit they found in the preschool closet (from a Christmas present) and with it, built their own model airplanes--from their own imaginations!  I was impressed.  I thought they had used the instructions for sure!}

Earthly Father, Heavenly Father

How is it that every Mormon Message that is produced is my new favorite?  They just keep getting better!!  But truly, this video and its accompanying message (and music) is awe-inspiring.

I ponder on the words of this film and think, "Yes. This must be how Heavenly Father feels. So close and yet physically far--working, always working to provide for our every need, as well as our immortality and eternal life. And the life He has provided us, just like the home we provide for our children, is our world. And though we don't understand "how it all came to be" we trust Him and we love Him.

And I think with each passing day of parenthood, I understand my Heavenly Father, and His perfect paternal role just a little bit more...

What are your thoughts?

My 17 Point Manifesto

Yesterday I read an encouraging manifesto from one of my favorite authors (Ann Voskamp).
(You can read the article here in full.)  And no one can introduce it as well as she:

"Nearing the end of January, first month of the year.

"Now things are starting to get hard, and new habits, those things that we wear, start to wear thin.

"Feeling a bit overwhelmed and not sure how to overcome.

"So we nail it to our doors -- our 25 point manifesto for sanity in 2013."

After reading through the 25 points in the declaration, I have selected the ones that leaped off the page and nestled themselves right into the part of my heart that houses my wishes.  {And because I didn't want to put everything in quotes, the words next to each number are hers; most of the descriptions are my adaptations unless wrapped in quotations.} 

Perhaps they'll inspire you as well?

1. Flame first.

Light a candle in the morning -- as a symbol of you.  For you are a "light of the world" and you must put your candlestick up so it can give "light unto all that are in the house." (See Matthew 5:5:14-15)

2. Your work is art: it needs a soundtrack.

Find the music that your heart loves to hear and play it as an accompaniment to your daily work.  And sing.  Sing loud and clear--with your family and by yourself.  Sing reverently at times and vibrantly at others.  Sing so your heart can keep on growing.

"When sailors have to move a heavy load or raise an anchor, they all sing together to keep them up and give them vim.  That's just what artists lack." ~Vincent van Gogh

And don't we all participate in our own kind of art all day long?  Whether it's raising little children, working towards professional or church goals, it's all a manifestation of the gifts that Father has given us, and music can enhance so much. Music moves me in ways that nothing else can.  It is profound.

3. Stay in the pool.

When asked about how he achieved so many victories, Michael Phelps simply replied, "You've got to stay working in the pool longer than others."

Set your mind to a task, set a timer if necessary, and then endure well.  The rewards are always so bounteous.

4. Go Slow. Life Zone.

"Life isn't an emergency. It's a gift. Life's so extraordinary it warrants going slow, held in reverential awe."

Treat life as if it were dessert--not a meal to be wolfed down so we can "survive," but a delectable dessert that we wish to last forever.  Savor every bite. You won't regret it.

5. Take your laughter vitamins.

Because research is showing it's actually a physical and emotional medicine.

6. No songs without a rhythm.

Our daily life needs a routine {and I much prefer the term rhythm because it makes life sound so much more musical.}  This has been something I've been fine-tuning the last few weeks and the harmony is so very pleasant.

"Your life makes music when you play a string of tasks always together."

"Create your rhythm, a harmony of habits that are prompted by a definite location or time. Turn chaos into cadence."

"As music has rhythm, recurring refrains, order, so does peaceful parenting.  One action thoughtfully follows the next action that wisely follows the next. Days of habits, fluid and lyrical, create pleasing harmony."

7. Daily Stillness Appointment

"When is your 5 minute stillness appointment everyday?  Write that midday time in stone.  No cancellations allowed.  For 5 minutes midday, be still and cease striving.  Know He is God and the day looks very different.  Slow down: You only pass by this way once."

8. If the Heaven's Declare, get out there.

"The whole of the sky and the world is speaking endlessly of His glory.  When you step outside and listen, your soul revives.  You need that.  You really need one walk outside a day."

9. Work on your Wall before Noon.

Just like Nehemiah, who built the walls around Jerusalem, lay down just 3 bricks each day before noon, working diligently on those special callings the Lord has given you.

10. Envision the End Goal.

Heavenly Father "brought [Abraham] abroad and said, Look now toward heaven, and tell the stars, if thou be able to number them: and he said unto him, So shall thy seed be." (See Genesis 15:5)

Our Father gave Abraham a picture, a symbol, a vision of the stars and sky to represent his mission.  Take a picture, paint one, or find one that you can hang up to remind you of what the Lord has called you to do and a vision of your goal.

11. Consistently be Consistent.

Showing up is almost the entire battle and when we paint those little brushstrokes, those small and simple things really do make a difference.

"It's not what you do every now and then, but what you do everyday, that changes everything.  Do something at the same time everyday and you find yourself a new person."

12. Hard Stops.

It's what we do when we come to a stop sign, and if we "hard stop" to pray at set times of the day, it's what could truly give us the grace to go on.  A phone reminder, or a chime from a clock?  These could remind us to stop and pray, or in the words of President Monson, "Pause to pray."

13. Do the Holy, Happiness Habit

Write down 5, just 5 things to be grateful for each day and count your way well past 1000 gifts given from heaven through the year.  Recognize His hand and His ever-present tender mercies.

"Make right where you are your happy place."

14. Ebenezers for the Effort

"Mark little milestones! Celebrate the little things!  A treat at the end of the day, end of the week, end of the project, end of the term.  Hang a bunting. Taste something sweet. Take a happy, thumbs up picture to mark your progress!  Make an album of a year, of the process, of the overcoming."

And perhaps actually create an "ebenezer."  You see, back in the days of the prophet Samuel, there was an impending battle from the Philistines.  So the Israelites ask Samuel to implore the Lord for their rescue.  Samuel asked them to sacrifice some of their idolatrous sins and then he made a sacrifice on the altar in behalf of the people.

"And as Samuel was offering up the burnt offering, the Philistines drew near to battle against Israel: but the Lord thundered with a great thunder on that day upon the Philistines, and discomfited them; and they were smitten before Israel. (1 Samuel 7:10)

"Then Samuel took a stone, and set it between Mizpeh and Shen, and called the name of it Eben-ezer, saying, Hitherto hath the Lord helped us." (1 Samuel 7:12)

Find your own stone of help and set it up as a physical reminder so you can remember all that the Lord has done in delivering you.

15. Breathe.

Sometimes we just need to breathe.  In and out.

“The letters of the name of God in Hebrew YHWH… are infrequently pronounced Yahweh. But in truth they are inutterable….

"This word {YHWH} is the sound of breathing.

"The holiest name in the world, the Name of Creator, is the sound of your own breathing. That these letters are unpronounceable is no accident. Just as it is no accident that they are also the root letters of the Hebrew verb ‘to be’… God’s name is name of Being itself.”  ~Rabbi Lawrence Kushner

So we breathe in His name with every breath we take.  Just Remember this.

16. Hard and Bad? Hot Bath.

"An evening routine of a hot bath at the end of the hard and bad days? Yes."

17. Rest so you can have the rest of God.

"Tomorrow always begins with the night before, so turn in early so tomorrow can turn out well."

This I need.

And all 17 declarations I need as well.  Somewhat hard at times?  Of course.  Nothing good ever comes without effort.

But keys to a happy and memorable year?  Most definitely.

17 has always been one of my favorite numbers...

P.S. This post is, as well as some of my other recent posts, the ideal.  We have a plan so we have something to strive for.  It doesn't mean that we always stick to everything just right.  Every day is full of imperfection and failures.  But that shouldn't keep us from striving, right?  Without a plan, life is just utter chaos (at least it is for me).  But with an idealistic plan, it gives me something to aim for.  It gives me a framework--even though most of the time I vary so greatly and fail time and time again.  But the Lord is so good to us.  Through Him we can be perfect, even in our imperfections.  He makes up the difference.  And I'm so grateful for His infinite grace.

If nothing else, just remember and rely on grace.